weed. marijuana. cannabis, or whatever else you call it. i call it weed. 

i’ve never smoked cigarettes or have done anything with nicotine. there was never an appeal to it for me. i never vaped with my classmates in between periods during high school. i was never tempted by all these different contraptions my friends were yielding in their pockets during college for a quick buzz. but somehow, i fell addicted to weed and all its forms. 

i started when i was 20. i was balls-deep in depression and mental illness; i will not elaborate further on that because the point of writing this is not to dwell on my psychological state during college. a casual use overtime turned into every day consumption, and suddenly i’m 24 (turning 25) with the same bad habits as i did when i was in a worse internal situation. except now, i’m so much better. 

i have mullein tea arriving from my amazon order. i’ve been really into the idea that there’s a tea to fix every bodily issue i have. my respiratory system feels clogged with mucus and residue, and all i want to do is feel clear of the toxins that have plagued me for the past 4 and a half years. 

i will still consume edibles. i am not crazy, i know not to quit anything cold-turkey, especially when i have been doing it daily for almost half a decade. and i will probably have a bong rip with my best friend on my birthday in june, because who i am if i don’t celebrate another year around the sun with my favorite vice. what is life all about, then (please note my sarcasm). 

the point is harm reduction. the point is i am setting a timer on the nomo app to see how long i can go. the point is i want my lungs and throat to feel clear of toxins for the first time since fall 2021. the point is i can, and i will.